Sunday, August 1, 2010

Lagos Transport Chronicles: see me see Inception

Happy August Everyone!
You would think that today being the first day of the month, and being a SUNDAY too, there would be some kinda special blessings to go with it.
Well, the Contractor doing the road and some selfish government official had other plans for the residents of Lekki (a lovely portion of Lagos inhabited largely by a crop of nouveau elites of which I am not one sadly).
1.       Mr. Contractor and his crew have dug up craters all over the road. Stretching to over 3km. A four lane traffic road has been reduced to 2 and in some places 1. The contractor has got his equipment and tractors and whatnot lying all over the road taking up more precious space. (If I judge his pace by his earlier work – another 3 km stretch at the beginning of the road - this job might not be over by 2012)
Eg. All through the weekend no work was done. But I can bet you as sure as the sky is blue, first thing tomorrow morning. At peak time 7.30 when workers and school children are trying to beat the 8am start time; those tractors are going to come alive and add to the madness. As if Mondays are not hateful enough.
2.       Then comes the Lagos car owners on the road…..each one thinks he has a more pressing appointment to meet than the rest of the road users. So s/he becomes very selfish. Does not allow another driver to inch into his space. Thinks that because s/he has a 4 wheel drive he can drive along the un-tarred end (thus creating a new lane) then barge into your lane when his artificial road way Sireee.
3.       Then you have the Big shot government official who decided to host a party/wedding/political campaign (like I CARE!) in a venue located along the road today. These party venues rarely make allowances for parking spaces in their building plans. What to do? Mr. Big Shot colonizes the inner portions of the roads (Both to and fro side) and turns them into parking lot for his guests. How magnanimous. So if you are like me who wasn’t invited to the party errr, sorry! The traffic was almost standstill. I could have left the car, waltzed into that party. Ate my face-full and waltzed back to the car without missing a thing. It was that bad. Come to think of it, I should have done that.

The thing was, I was starting to feel like an unserious movie reviewer.  I mean every one who wants to be taken seriously (be it the IT girl/Social butterfly/Leonardo fan/movie reviewer has seen the movie Inception and most gave it an overwhelming 10 (God give me the brains to understand and appreciate this movie cos I have a feeling I may think its crap and give it a 5 and get stoned).
So JG who has had me nagging him all week to steal it off the net (don’t bother the prints are A-crappy) said lets go see it at Genesis Cinema. I nearly pecked his cheek off in gratitude.
Movie was at 5pm. We left at 4pm. On a reasonably bad weekday traffic, it could take 45mins. On a typical Sunday it takes 18mins. Today, it took us 75 mins to get HALFWAY. We had to turn back. Still same traffic. We had to stop over to eat some comfort food then head home. Traffic Still. Got home at 8.40pm.

Alas the inception to see Inception was there but the traffic killed it.


  1. Traffic! I hate it! Actually in the last week I was in to it just a TINY bit b/c I got a book on CD from the library... although it is weird having a strange person read to you, the book was good so traffic was fun.

    I remember people visiting our area and saying, "Virginia Beach is the only place that actually wants to KILL it's residents" b/c the roads were always torn up with construction everywhere. I was in college then... now I'm 44 and the roads look the SAME!

  2. lol. Nowadays my reading time is gratefully grabbed during travel to and fro work so I half-long for slow traffic.
    I am thankful I don't have to grapple with the wheels of a vehicle though. Yay! for public transport



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