Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Unasked for opinions and other Africanisms

So I went to a meeting of Nigerian Union of students in Durham. A sort of 'lets get acquainted' stuff.
Why did I go? I’m normally not interested in such stuff. Guess I thought it would be an opportunity to make friends and/or just to hear nasal twangs like mine.
Was it worth going to? Yeah it was. The Naija jocularity was there, the wisecracks, the pidgin. I was giggling before I knew it.
Made some new friends. But some of the gals had attitudes that stunk a mile off and I wondered why? I say a friendly hello and I get the lookover and a languid flick of the hands. Hell no, ill trained child! Learn to smile and look like you mean it. That’s what people in polite society do. Its not a sorority gathering.
I even got to run for Treasurer for the group. And lost :D 
It was a last 2-minute decision thing to run. Thought it might look good on a resume. The best candidate won and I’m all relieved. phew! what was I thinking??
So there was this guy. Man. Older man in the group. We generally acknowledged he was the oldest (even gave him the honorary title of advisor) though as he came to prove not necessarily the wisest.
After the meeting disbanded, people strolled around, making friends, exchanging numbers. So I was with this group when Egbon (Big Brother) strolled over and we reintroduced ourselves. We discovered we finished from same University and coincidentally even same faculty. Then he asks me what course I was studying and I tell him Medical Anthropology and he says “Oh, But you should have applied for Public Health. That would have been a better choice”.
‘Heck No! I didn’t hear you say that. Excuse me? I think I knew ALL about the Masters in Public Health before I made my choice’.
What gives? I made my school searches, wrote my application, wrote my personal statement, worked my butt off to save for school and you dare under 2 minutes of acquaintance to devalue or dismiss my choice just because it’s not an MBA or MPH, the only degrees you can easily rattle off?
Next please…
My college (equivalent of Hall of residence in Nigeria) had a formal dinner for the Seniors. *wink wink* the postgraduates and Ph.D students. I was quite excited about it. Invited a friend of mine Danny from another College. It's veerrrry formal so you get to wear the college gown (graduation kinda gown) over your Pretties. ewww. That just spoilt the effects.

I didnt leave as happily as I came though.
(rant here) It is soooo damn hard fitting in with this bunch here!! I am almost throwing in my towel at trying to make friends. you know..the warm fuzzy kind. the kind you go to with all the minute gossip. the kind you feel free to hug cause you re cold or just want to feel another warm human.
Danny felt so bad for me. He's lucky he stays in a college thats purely for postgraduates. so its a potpourri of Nationalities. I stay at a mini Buckingham palace.
Heaven, I need a hug right now!

p.s. This hopefully will be my one and only pity party personal post. I'm gonna remain upbeat for the rest of 2010 or die trying!!


  1. Awww deaar, here is a feel good hug *insert hug in here*

    I totally feel you on the egbon who was flippant enough to suggest you study Public health. Is he crazy? Thats how people earn a reputation for oversabi. In Nigeria, if they feel one course is lubrative...the next 20 million students will strive to study the same thing. I did an I regret why I didnt go to the cordon bleu to pursue my passion for culinary arts. Nonsense egbon. Ewu potiskum sef.

  2. Awww, a hug. Hmmm, okay let me think about it.

  3. Darling Ginger! I'm so sorry these people were not welcoming. But, seeing you in your blue dress, they were so jealous of you that they could not be friendly. You are exquisitely beautiful. I don't know how anyone wouldn't love you, unless you made them green with envy with your pretty self! And oh my that smile! I am so proud of you I'm bursting! Love, Mom.

  4. Girl you look hawt in that dress.
    Also, it is not by force to make friends. Just take your time and find someone you have something in common with....and surround yourself with people you can trust.



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