Wednesday, August 28, 2013

I Do Not Come To You By Chance Review

I finally read my copy of ‘I do not come to you by chance by Adaobi Tricia Nwaubani. Wonder why it took me so long!!

I was so caught up in the plot that I didn’t want to get to the end, yet I was very curious to know the fate of the protagonists.
Adaobi sure told a damn good yarn.
I laughed, I cringed, I sighed. The background was an environment I knew intimately having grown up in Aba. The Mbamalu family were my neighbours, my cousins. Cash Daddy? We knew a few.

I loved the intimate views Ms Nwaubani gave us of the inner workings and flamboyant lives of 419 kingpins in the 90s. I don’t think they live like that anymore thanks to EFCC and international crime collaborations.
Who thinks like me that 419 kingpins have been replaced by politicians? And I doubt that for some, if not most, their intimate lives differ much.

Gotta say that the image of Cash Daddy sat atop the loo doing the doo, while his assistants and lackeys stand outside the open toilet door, taking notes, inhaling that air, listening to those boborygmic noises without cracking a grimace is one that will stick with me for a very looong time. Smh!!

It may have seemed like Adaobi Nwaubani painted an overly sympathetic view of a fraudster. I mean the way it happened with Kingsley, the poverty and urgency of events made it all plausible. However isn’t that how things happen sometimes? Especially with health when you are thinking life or death. School fees, Child birth, a Death, Hunger. (think prostitution. Think theft)

‘There go I but for his grace” John Bradford.

Kingsley could have easily been my brother if circumstances were different. In the 90s, his best friends (2 cousins) lived with an Uncle in Aba who was involved in 419. My brother used to come back with tales of Ghana-must-go bags filled with forex idling on passageways.
I was so worried for my brother that my prayers intensified over him. Confession – to think my 16yr old self used to fancy one of the cousins (the taller darker one lol) yet I knew I didn’t want my brother involved with them.
I used to scrutinize my brother’s behavior/wardrobe/activities – was he spending more money than usual, buying more clothes, has he stopped borrowing money from me lol – to gauge his involvement with them. Nay, he remained the same brokeass brother I had always known.
My parents weren’t as worried (they didn’t know). We knew their scathing opinion of people who were involved in such fraudulent activities, waxing lyrical about ‘how a good name was better than gold’.
But I remember when the son of a close family friend gburu ozu (hit it, struck gold, don’t ask me joo) and within 3 months bought new cars for his parents, renovated their home in the village, bought a townhouse for the family and generally turned the family’s fortunes around. My parents are human. I am human. I looked at my dad’s red 504 Peugeot car which he had bought 3 years before I was born and wondered if it would have been so bad if my brother had ‘worked’ with his friends for at least 6 months then smartly retired with his loot.

“There go I but for His Grace”.

There are four other personal commentaries I’d like to make on Tricia Nwaubani’s book:

1. The imagery Tricia painted of the Nigerian society albeit a microcosm (Umuahia/Aba), was it much different from Tim Newman’s? Or was it cause it was a novel so we decided to treat it as fiction or maybe cause it was written by a daughter of the soil we had less objection.
It also made me think of the strong role poverty has to play in the morality of a society.
How can you expect the family, community who have genuinely obtained help in their time of need from these ‘familial fraudsters’ ever have the heart to turn against them? Despite Kingsley’s mother’s rejection of 419, do you think she could ever condemn Cash Daddy publicly after he came to her late husband’s aid? I doubt it. So to Tim Newman, sometimes there lies your answer when you ask why the fraudulent Officer/politician/peer isn’t roundly condemned. You can’t point one finger without the rest 4 pointing back at you.

2. I remember the furore over Ms Nwaubani’s article about helps in Nigeria. Having read her book which was published at least 2 years before that article, I wonder now why there was surprise. Did we not observe that the helps in “I do not come to you by chance” were regarded as subs? There was even a reference to “one’s feral smell” which had irked most readers in her article – yet they were there in her book. Take a look at Cash Daddy who by right was actually a stepbrother to Augustina. Yet he was treated as badly. He was there at their benevolence. An opportunity he was expected to be grateful.  
I have seen similar attitude often in real life.

3. This book has made me further ambivalent about 419 victims with the EXCEPTION of victims of confidence tricksters - those who believed in a ‘reasonably genuine offer’ and were defrauded with the tiny print (oyibo type 419) and Single/lonely/old/young men and women whose hearts were preyed on.
But for the rest, those who fall for ‘barely legal deals’ cause they can see the chance of making 300% profit for doing nothing at all, I wonder if I should feel sympathy for them? “A fool and his money are soon parted innit?”. Shrug.
***This does not mean that I don’t believe 419ers deserve punishment. They definitely do. For their predatory behavior, the chicanery and forgery they promote and just for their sheer nuisance value. If I got a pound for every scam mail that comes to my mailbox I will be Croesus.

4. I am ashamed to confess that I marvelled at Merit’s rejection of Kingsley when she found out he was a fraudster. I found myself batting for his side and thinking she was too tough. I hoped she will forgive and reconsider cause he really had a ‘good heart’ - inspite of his cruel 419 activities.
I lay the blame at Tricia’s door for that temporary lapse in judgment. She manipulated my brain joo.

The twist at the end was definitely unexpected! Left me chuckling and thinking that indeed ‘the more things change, the more they remain the same’.
Aluta Continua!
I applaud Tricia Nwaubani’s talent as a writer especially her ability to create characters who were truly multidimensional. They were very human (kind/wicked/selfish/loving) in their struggles. I admired, loved and hated Kingsley, Cash Daddy, Augustina, Ola, Merit in equal parts at frequent intervals.
Contrast this with Nollywood’s one dimensional characters and you’ll understand what I mean. 

I look forward to reading more from you Ms Nwaubani. Pls, don’t be a one hit wonder!!

While reading some reviews about the book, I noticed many Oyibos critic its grammar or should I say patois. Abegi, Nigerian English has come to stay. Get over yourselves.

Next on my reading list – Sue Townsend’s Queen and I or Chimmy’s Americanah?

minnie minnie mannie more…


Monday, August 26, 2013

The Abuser and The Abused

Hey people,
Kedu nu? I’ve been fine. Hope you have too. A lot has been on my plate in recent times and I wish I could share. But all in good time. Just say a lil prayer for me ok? Mwah. I will for you too.

So I’ve been following all the hot gist on the media waves. Lola Makinde Wedding story (Intriguing!). DesertSun’s Nigerian experience (Depressingly true), Ms. Kola who doesn’t want to come back to Nigeria (errr 160,000,000 – 1? Sai gobe) and Ese Walter’s tale of pastoral sexual abuse. Sigh

I’ll just take some time to throw some light on this notion of abused/victim and Abuser which it seems many objected to in her narrative.

Sexual exploitation is any form of sexual contact or invitation to sexual contact, with an adult by a professional person, cleric or anyone in a position of authority, trust or power over that adult whether or not there is consent from the individual . . . Meaningful consent for sexual activity is not possible in a fiduciary relationship.

Can clergy sexual activity ever be consensual on the part of the victim?  No!  The power differential in the relationship automatically puts the priest/reverend/deacon in the position of power. Therefore, there can never exist a true mutually consensual agreement.

Clergy misconduct of a sexual nature (clergy sexual misconduct) is about power - power which is abused through sexualized behavior. It is always the PASTOR'S responsibility to ensure that appropriate boundaries are experienced in the pastor-congregant relationship.

Clergy misconduct is a grave injustice toward another person and an entire religious community. It is a power issue. A sacred trust is violated.

*Fiduciary duty refers to the responsibility of licensed caregivers (doctors, therapists, lawyers, social workers, etc.) to "do no harm."  Society's expectation of these caregivers is that they will attend to the needs of those in their care.
Ministers, pastors, priests and rabbis are often the first choice for those seeking emotional as well as spiritual assistance.  Their role as counselors gives them fundamentally the same responsibility to those in their care as therapists have to their current or former clients.

And this is why Clergy business has become Court business.

Not all countries have laws to deal with Sexual misconduct among the clergy but it is important to note that in places where such a law exists, example Arkansas in the United States, consensuality is not a defense.
           5-14-126. Sexual assault in the third degree.
(a) A person commits sexual assault in the third degree if the person [is]:
(B) A professional under Ark. Code Ann. 12-12-507(b) or a member of the clergy and is in a position of trust or authority over the victim and uses the position of trust or authority to engage in sexual intercourse or deviate sexual activity…
(2) (b) It is no defense to a prosecution under this section that the victim consented to the conduct.

Ms. Walter detailed the events that led up to the sexual encounter in London. Becoming a new Church member. Joining the hierarchy of workers. Receiving special attention from the Pastor. Moving to London. Mail exchanges. How many of us would not have done with she did for the Bishop?
Booking him a cab.
Making a hotel booking.
Wouldn’t you feel honored that he has entrusted you to such…knowing you can’t be the only church member in London?
How many would have thought it untoward to meet up with this respected Pastor.
When you meet him and he holds on to that handshake for seconds longer than necessary, or maybe embraces you or touches your arms, many of you would automatically think…hmmm something fishy here.
Yet, think the way you would have reacted if this were your co-worker, your classmate – your equal. You would have immediately recognized the breach of boundaries.
But with an older person, a boss, an old family friend, a clergy you keep pushing back those reactions because..haba he is a pastor. He is respected. He is a Man of God. You might even ask God to forgive you for daring to think your holy pastor was capable of this.
Now the pastor on his part, remember did not send for you by chance. He has it all planned out. He has been grooming you in his mind. He has an idea of how strong/streetwise etc you are. After all you had passed the initial tests by doing all the above service for him. So he knows you have a healthy respect/fear for him/his office.
He thus continues to test how far he can go. “Come sit on my laps” he asks. You sit (still wondering why).
He lightly strokes the breast. You squirm and hope that was a mistake. He does it again. You squirm again. He puts his hand on your laps.

Na so handshake dey pass elbow. Before you know it, you and your pastor are playing the “No bishop”, “Yes my dear” game.

Now we wonder “Why didn’t Ese storm out of the room?”.
Well, same way you have women who stay in battered relationships for years. And you have those that jump ship at the first raising of hands.
Blame it on women's socialization to be polite, nonconfrontational and accepting of men's behavior, Blame it on culture, Blame it on self esteem lack, blame it on lack of awareness.
That is why some manage to escape like Franca and some become victims like Ese. And they shouldn’t be judged any less for it. That is why laws are made, to protect those who can’t/couldn’t protect themselves.
I applaud Ese’s bravery in telling her story knowing the stigma and ridicule that will come with it. She might not get her day in court because I doubt that Nigeria has evolved to enact such laws (who will bell the cat?!).
But I don’t think that’s even what she is asking for.

All she asks is that he steps down from his earthly church throne albeit temporarily, make restitution to those he has hurt and GET HEALED HIMSELF before he continues his pastoral work.


Lastly, I saw this comment online and I quote “The time has come for each of us who sincerely follow the teachings of Christ to speak out concerning the proper loving actions we should have toward our brothers and sisters and against what can only be described as bad religion”.

What do you think?
p.s. Check out these interesting articles on Pastoral Sexual Abuse - Soul Stealing
Also 11 Reasons why Pastors should never date their parishioners


Thursday, August 22, 2013

Scholar dismisses Fani-Kayode's Igbo/Yoruba Academic History

I don’t know if some of you might have read this memo ‘allegedly’ from an Igbo scholar, Dr. Samuel Okafor, which dismisses some of the claims made by one-time Aviation Minister/self-confessed philanderer, Femi Fani-Kayode,  in his controversial August 8 article, "The Bitter Truth About The Igbo", which set off a social media storm that almost threatened Igbo-Yoruba relations. (really?! faceless social media warriors?? Ha!)

I did not join in the debate online or off line. I more or less assumed a siddon look approach. Why? Because I have decided that I am above being used by irrelevant/wanna-be relevant ex politicians like Orji Uzoh Kanu and Fani-Kayode to score cheap tribal points.
If the protests had been from a more credible Igbo politician or the rebuttal had come from a politician ex or present more credible than FFK maybe maybe I would have been pushed to take sides.
An ex school mate of mine who posted the 'inflammatory article' on his FB timeline managed to generate over 200 comments as young Nigerian men and women bickered like they had no other job. I was so tempted to un-friend him for propagating stupidity.

So when an Aunty emailed this to me, I was we go again, but on reading the letter and googling some names, I was surprised to find that they were true. So here I am, passing on the info. Not to start off new controversies please Noo.
Call it edutainment :).

In the first part of an article entitled "The Lies of Femi Fani-Kayode", Samuel Okafor, who has a 1st Class and PhD in History from the University of Nigeria Nsukka (I guess he needed to state his educational pedigree), sought to address point by point what he termed "the most reckless amongst the tangle of reckless comments spewed by Femi, a character who with each punch of his keypad stresses his severely unwell conditions of logorrhoea, delusions of enlightenment, history and sociology - amongst others."  Ok, I had to quote that bit. Too funny!.

Femi Lies About the Yorubas Being Nigeria's Earliest Graduates:
Femi FaniKayode claims the Yoruba were the first to acquire Western education; the first ever known record of a literate Nigerian in the English Language is the narrative of an Ibo slave Equanoh Olaodoh who regained his freedom and documented his life history as a slave from the time he was 11 years old in present day Ibo land till the time when he gained his freedom in the middle of the 18 th century. He later married an English woman and had 3 children. He died in 1795.
His autobiography, The Interesting Narrative of the Life of Olaudah Equiano, depicts the horrors of slavery and influenced the enactment of the Slave Trade Act of 1807. His claim to African origins have been challenged by another historian but without available proof to disprove him, Equiano’s autobiography stands.

Mazi Blyden
Dr Okafor asks that we google the name Edward Wilmot BLYDEN - an educated son of free Ibo slaves who by the mid-19th century had acquired sound self taught theological education. He was born in Saint Thomas in 1832. He is one of the founding missionaries that established the Archbishop Vining church in Ikeja. 
I did a google search, and just seeing the man’s face I could swear he was my ancestor. That face is sooo Igbotic!! Lol.  
Err…..despite his Igbo root claims, he is more or less British so I might not quickly quote this, but it certainly brought slave trade home.

Dr Okafor makes claim that the third president of free Liberia - President J JRoyle – was again, a man of Ibo descent. A search on google did not list any J J Royle but I hit gold when I checked the past presidents of Liberia, the 5th President of Liberia Edward James Roye (President from 1870 – 1871)  is said to be a descendant of the Igbo people. 

 Dr Okafor also states that the first Nigeria doctor was an Effik man Silas G. Dove who obtained a medical degree from France and returned to practise medicine in 1840 in Calabar. This he said can be verified from historical medical records in Paris. It contradicts FFK's claim that the Yoruba were the first lawyers and doctors in Nigeria. Couldn’t verify this on google maybe when i go to Paris....
Back in Nigeria, Dr Okafor says that before the civil war Ibos controlled and dominated all institutions in the formal sector in Nigeria from the universities to the police to the military to politics because of their advanced education:

Nigeria's first Professor of History - Professor Kenneth Dike who published the first account of trade in Nigeria in pre-colonial times. He was also the first African Vice Chancellor of the University of Ibadan.

First Professor of Microbiology - Professor Eni Njoku; he was also the first African Vice Chancellor of the University of Lagos.

First Nigerian Professor of Mathematics - an Ibo man - Professor Chike Obi. He was followed by another Ibo man, Professor James Ezeilo, Professor of Differential Calculus and the founder of the Ezeilo Constant. He later became the Vice Chancellor of the University of Nigeria, Nsukka and one of the founders of the Nigerian Mathematical Centre.

First Professor of Anatomy and Physiology at the University College Ibadan was Professor Chike Edozien, an Asaba man and current Obi of Asaba.

First Professor of Physics? Professor Okoye, who became a Professor of Physics at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology in 1960. He was followed by the likes of Professor Alexander Anumalu who has been nominated for the Nobel Prize for Physics three times for his research in Intermediate Quantum Physics. Never heard of him. Totally impressed!

First Professor of Nuclear Physics and Chemistry - again another Ibo man - Professor Frank Ndili who gained a Ph.D in his early '20s at Cambridge University in Nuclear Physics and Chemistry in the early '60s.

First Professor of Statistics - Professor Adichie.

First Nigerian Professor of Medicine - Professor Kodilinye - he was appointed a Professor of Medicine at the University of London in 1952. He later became the Vice Chancellor of the University of Nigeria after the war.

First Professor of Astronomy - Professor Ntukoju.

Philosophy - Professor G D Okafor, who became a Professor of Philosophy at the Amherst College USA in 1953.

Economics - Dr. Pius Okigbo who became a visiting scholar and Professor of Economics at the University of London in 1954. He is also the first Nigerian Ph.D in Economics.

Theology and theological research - Professor Njoku was the first Nigerian to earn a Ph.D in Theology from Queens University Belfast in Ireland. He was appointed a Professor of Theology at the University College Zambia in 1952.

According to Samuel, Femi Fani-Kayode has peddled falsehoods not backed by facts/research. "That the West were the first to see the white man and interact with him does not mean that you are way ahead of other groups. The Ibo as the late Achebe said had within a span of 40 years bridged the gap and even surpassed the Yoruba in education by the '60s." (I am only quoting this bit because I too have always believed that Western Nigeria was more advanced in education without ever challenging that history or considering that dynamics could change over time).

Further more, Samuel also states that the Binis were actually way ahead of the game than other tribes (maybe a Bini person will publish a rebuttal with names?)
The Bini who were the dominant military force from the 15th to the 19th century raided and sold other ethnicities to the Europeans. Top on the list of those they sold were the Yoruba, Igbo and Igala. Various other ethnicities suffered as a result of the Bini military expansion. 
Slaves were moved from the hinterland to the coast and many were sold through Eko to the New World. These slaves were the first to encounter the Europeans and by extension their way of life - this included education in a Western sense. The Bini King had taken pains to establish a diplomatic presence in Portugal and the relationship developed into areas that extended beyond trade in the late 15th century and lasted well into the early 19th century. Scores of young Bini youth were sent to Portugal and studied there, coming back with advanced degrees in various disciplines. Indeed, some went with their Yoruba and Ibo slaves who served the sons of the Benin nobility while they studied in Portugal. The next set of people to receive Western education were therefore the slaves themselves. Some of them managed to buy their freedom and develop themselves further.
These are facts that can be verified by the logs kept by ship owners in Portugal from 1494 to 1830. It is kept at the Portuguese Museum of Geographic History in Lisbon. o___0

In recent times, facts from the Federal Office of Statistics on education show that 3 Ibo states (Imo, Anambra and Abia) for the past 12 years have constantly had the largest number of graduates in the country, producing more graduates than Ondo, Osun, Ekiti and Oyo states. Yet Femi Kayode calls Ibos traders. I thought we were??! I wear the badge proudly!
Another often peddled lie is that the Yoruba have the largest number of professors in the country. The Nigerian Universities Commission has a record of the state with the largest number of professors on their records and as at 2010 that state is Imo State followed by Ondo State and then Anambra State; the next state is Ekiti and then Delta before Kwara State.

In his conclusion, Dr. Samuel Okafor says “It does not matter if your father was the first Lawyer or first Doctor in Nigeria but rather what matters is what an individual does with the talents the Almighty has given to him. Let us open up Nigeria for competition. That is the solution to our problems. Those who want privileges keep reminding us that their fathers were the first to go to school in London. Every generation produces its own leaders and champions. Like Dangote who is the biggest employer of labour in Nigeria today and the richest man in Africa. Was his father the first to go to study in London? Yet he is the master of people whose parents gave them the best. My brothers, the answer to the Nigerian problem is that we should establish a merit-driven society. "I get am before" no be property.

I am with him on establishing a merit-driven Nigeria. Amen to that.
And I must add, that all that ‘First in XYZ' education has not exactly advanced the lot of Eastern Nigeria or Nigeria as a whole 'scientifically/economically’ today. Sniff sniff.
But we soldier on.
It was interesting to learn of ‘illustrious sons of the soil’ and to think there was a time when Nigeria was merit driven. Can you imagine an Igbo man as VC in University of Ibadan or vice versa, a Yoruba man as VC in UNN in this generation?

Saturday, August 10, 2013

Oprah and The Racist Zurich Salesgirl

In case you missed this itty bit of news from yesterday….Oprah while in Switzerland for Tina Turner's wedding, went into a shop and asked the Swiss shopgirl to bring down a bag so she can have a better look at it. Swiss Salesgirl told Oprah that she will bring her other bags of similar quality that are less expensive, but that one Mba…is too mush for her purse. Oprah repeated the request two more times, insisting that she really wanted to see that particular black bag. Shopgirl still politely said No offering other less costly bags.
Oprah quietly said thank you and walked out of the shop.
So why did the sales girl refuse Oprah?
The bag was positioned on a shelf above her head. Maybe She didn’t want to go through the stress of bringing it down.
Counter argument – If she had thought the customer talking to her could afford it, she would have climbed up before you can say 'monkey' and made that 35,000 euro sale

Oprah is lying
What does she have to gain from lying when this can easily be refuted by CCTV?

The Shopgirl did not know who Oprah was
Granted Oprah’s show is not regularly aired in Switzerland so she might not be as popular to Swiss locals, but Shopgirl is supposed to treat all customers equally - not guess at the size of their account based on appearance before responding

The Shopgirl was being Racist
Oprah was black and therefore looked even less likely to afford the expensive bag (wonder what Oprah wore that day??).
You are damn right.

Listening to Trudie Goetz defence of her Salesgirl, I didn’t know if she was suffering from communication in English or just plain stubbornness in the face of truth.
I believe she rather said something like ’we have some less expensive’ — ’we also have some less expensive bags’ and not ’it’s too expensive for you “ 
“The shop assistant apparently asked her (Oprah) if she would like to see the bag, but she apparently said ’No, I just want to look’.

Biko, Please, Ejoo, what is the difference between see and look? We have some less expensive/not ‘it’s too expensive for you’

Anyway, the statement ‘she wasn’t sure it was Miss Oprah or somebody else’ was singularly incriminating. Mscheew.

Two lessons learnt from this:
Humility - As one of the richest and popular women in the entertainment world, she could have gotten away with ‘Do you know who I am? or imperially demanded to see her manager’. How many of us could have resisted doing that. But she didn’t. She said thank you and walked out.
Loyalty??- I admire Trudie Goetz the shop owner for not throwing her salesgirl under the bus at the first opportunity. She could have easily told the media, ‘I have sacked the salesgirl. I do not tolerate such behaviour’ and come out smelling of roses. But here she is trying to defend her Salesgirl of 3 years. I’m still not sure if the case is that she trusts her employee and truly believes there was a misunderstanding or because she is a bigger racist and does not wish to apologise…indeed she has not apologised to Oprah. But let me be the bigger person and go with loyalty.

Racism is alive and real but in the words of MJ in the song Black or White – ‘I’m not gonna spend my life being a colored’. I will go about my way jejely and do my best. I’m quite shocked about Switzerland though. I thought it was the most egalitarian country in Europe what with housing the bastions of equality and diversity the UN, UNESCO etc.
Someone tell me to wake up.

Monday, August 5, 2013

5 Things you didnt know about Atilola

Now that Atilola has had her fun, let me have mine lol. Ladies and Gentlemen, five things you might wanna know about her:
#1. Atilola is tiny. Lol. Don’t be deceived by the giantess that towers in her ‘Spoken word’ I have been told I am smallish. Tall but cause I am slim…small. If I am small, Atilola is tiny. See pix here

#2. This lady loves Chinese. Hates Pizza and Oyibo food. Grin** Her train had arrived after 4pm so I was thinking late lunch/hunger with a capital H. Oya lets go find food. I first offered Pizza hut (easy to locate – I am still an MK newbie) I was also longing for their buffet salad options. But Atilola gave me the eye and twisted lips ‘Pizza’? Lol I had to quickly think of alternatives – Nandos? Harvesters? Chinese? *smile* Jackpot!!.
Red Chilli house it was which served a buffet of Chinese, Indian, Mexican and Japanese food. New discovery for me and It was actually better than Zen Garden Chinese Restaurant (the popular one which was closed). 90minutes after, satisfied guest and I left for home. Thank God.
**for the rest of her stay, she ate like a sparrow.

#3. Atilola is Super observant. It took her pointing out the ‘weird titles’ of the books on my shelf for me to realize that I either had a weird reading taste or I am attracted to books with ‘interesting titles’ lol.

#4. Atilola is a Superwoman. In case you don’t know Atilola has published two books. She is the creator of the African Naturalista hair blog. She produces her own branded hair products for sale. And she runs that blog as well as Atilola Writes. At 00.25am while I was struggling with sleep, this babe was scheduling blog entries for November on the Naturalista blog. While I was chatting and lolling on Whatsapp, she was making business calls to Nigeria - Importing/exporting. Babe is a dynamo. I dedicate D’banj’s Igwe to her. O si na nwata buru ogaranya, Someborri say Amii!!

#5. Atilola is shy. I don’t know how the dynamo, super-smart and shy maid cohabit, but they do so perfectly.

Lastly, Atilola actually reads my blog or I guess this is linked to super observant quality above. Her first comment to me at the train station was – ‘You are not as dark as you say you are joo’. *smiles*  
Toinlicious, you fell my hand seriously :'(. Blog with Spicy name linked to bread. Complexion woes. And you still came up with Cherry. Send me cherry-bread when you see it o! lol. I still love you shaa.

Honeydame come and take five please. 
Phew. I know i am unknown but  I had faith in my small community of friends na.

It was a pleasure to finally meet you Atilola. Hope to see you again soonest. We didn't get to see Milton Keynes famous concrete cows. Next time :)
MK's concrete cows. Dont ask me its history. Idk!

Ahh, I nearly forgot. I have one beef with Atilola.
So I reserved my yarn braid loosening till she came around :p.  It was heaven to have another hand on my hair. We did short work of the braids within 1hr, what would have taken me the better part of a day if done by myself.
But there was actually an ulterior motive, I haven’t retouched my hair in 8months and I wanted ‘expert advice’.
Me - Atilola, what do you think of my natural hair.
Atilola  - ‘You are not serious, Ginger (after running hands through my hair). This is not even natural hair. (surprised face me) You see where the nappy part ends? You need to cut off all the retouched bits above it, only then can you say you’ve gone natural.
Deflated Me – Ok a very small voice.

Didn’t stop me from trying to rock the hair shaa with scarves ala natural-laxed hair lol. My natural hair loving work colleague was ecstatic that I hadn’t succumbed to the devil’s white cream as I had threatened to.
Cheapest braids i had done. 3 packs of Wool = 3 pounds
I had initially planned to rock my hair for the foreseeable fortnight but plans changed after I saw DBF. Note: this is the first time he was seeing my hair la natural, the look on his face was priceless ….like what has happened to my Ginger braids. Lmao!! I was like ‘I am real like Jlo Indie Arie’. Original African Queen like me berra watch it.
For lack of a stronger/local sounding Igbo name in his limited vocabulary, he dubbed me ‘Obianuju’ as opposed to ‘Mgbeke (apologies Original Mgbeke).

My Tiwa Savage inspired braids
Anyway, in 72hrs, I had had enough of painful hair combing and shedding hair like an Afghan dog on the pillow. I braided up my hair pretty as you please. Phew.



Related Posts with Thumbnails