Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Blogging Anonymously or Publicly

This blogging daily business is haaard!! MsTizzle inspires and shames me in equal measure lol. Keep it up dear gal!

I found Nutty Jay’s last post about pros and cons of going public as a blogger quite interesting.

I think that’s one question most of us battle with at some stage in our blogging journey. To do or not to do?
Two things you might like to consider before you pull the mask:

Can you defend the words/views/opinions you have written?
I blog semi-anonymously and I’m perfectly satisfied with that. If my friends IRL/family get to discover my blog, I would have no qualms because there’s no word/opinion written by me on my blog that I cannot stand by. Disclaimer of course is that as a human being, my opinions can and WILL change due to ‘new knowledge being brought to light’/’a lived experience’ etc. Life is all about change innit?
One becomes a fraud when you live a life different from what you preach.

Have you written things that could affect other lives/future jobs?
Some of us have broken the confidentiality of family/friends/employers/customers in our blogs. You need to be aware of legal/economic consequences of being found out. 

Is it really necessary?
Or are you giving in to pressure from readers and friends. Readers are curious and won't mind putting a face to this person that writes so wonderfully..yet that doesn't make it necessary for you to satisfy them. If you want to start off a sort of business or turn your blog into a money making one linked to some sort of business/cause, then you may need to increase your fans' confidence by revealing yourself.  
Personally I’m not prepared to do that jare. Let the two communities remain apart. Like T-Note said in a comment on said post "The world is much too much of a noisy place to indulge free access to every side of you".

“Let the two communities remain apart”. 
As I write that, I pause and wonder what's the difference between these communities? Virtual difference? 
Not really. 
Lines have blurred over time. One can't keep sharing intimate details about yourself with strangers without a concomitant bond between similar souls. Its cosmic. Some of us have become fast friends offline. 
And even if an offline relationship exists not, it doesn't reduce the sense of sister/brotherhood blogging gives. A feeling I don't share with 80% of Facebook friends (mostly ex-school friends).

Blogging gives me the best of both worlds, an opportunity to write unbridled and enjoy a unique clique of friends.

The personal journeys we share, these are the stories we don’t see on social media. The heartaches/successes stories behind the ‘My life is so wonderful” updates on Facebook/Instagram.
That is why I find it easier to rejoice with friends on blogsville. And I didn't need to see your face to make it more legit. 
If I’ve followed your personal journey (as much of it as you have seen fit to share) and tomorrow you blog about vacations, promotions etc, rejoicing with you comes much more naturally because I know where you're coming from (Of course I don’t mean there must be  'suffering' to validate to success stories. But we do agree that real life, is not roses, is it? for most of us anyway).

I have been enriched by blogging. I don’t know how people can say they wanna stop. I keep thinking what will make me stop? 
Never say never anyway. 
Maybe one day I will run out of words. Maybe one day my life will become so perfect/busy that blogging becomes a bore. But I can’t imagine disappearing and not keeping up with what is happening with you’ll.  Dollchic is a great example of a ‘retired blogger’ lol.

I call you friends cause you are my friends.

Thanks for the comments in last post. I feel greatly loved :) Mwah! Mwah!

p.s. I have told my family and close friends about my blog but It didn't 'wow them' like I thought (hides face). It was sort of like 'Oh you do?' Cool!. They check it out once or twice every quarter, and that's it lol. Overrated!

p.p.s. I have grown into the name Ginger and don't even feel a need to change it to my real name. Maybe I should just legitimise it? :)

Friday, November 1, 2013

Happy November and What Ginger Did Last Month

Hey Blog family

God bless you all. I’m back J

Happy November to y’all. The year is briskly marching to the end isn’t it? How do you feel about the last quarter? Got any plans you are working through to ensure that 2013 ends with a hurray? God’s blessings on your effort, Amen!!

I thought of challenging myself to 30 days of blogging last month but instead ended up without a post all month. Sigh…Prism and Okeoghene I am following your lead oo!
November is the National Blog Posting Month – NaBloPoMo, so watch out!

Nigeria was 53 years a month ago. Did you celebrate it? My sister said I should try and join the activities in Nigeria house  *confused face*. For what na? To eat jollof-rice or what? Another time biko. But I did offer a prayer for my country. E must better!!

My eldest sis was in the UK this past month. Half of it with spent with me in Milton Keynes. It was a wonderful wonderful time for catching up on family and personal gist. I must admit that I was quite surprised at the renewed bonding. I have been a disappointment to her for so long (she isn’t happy with my career progress etc) that I dreaded her visit.
But rather than it being a period of recrimination, we actually got to understand each other better. We shared some of our challenges which improved understanding and cleared some long term friction that had built up (mostly on my part. I don’t think she noticed, just playing her big sister role lol).
We had fun mostly - except for the times I had to spend calming her paranoia. She has been so groomed by all the news and stories she reads about psychopathic neighbours, murderers in the wood, etc, that I spent an inordinate amount of time calming her fears about my neighbours lol. I also loved cooking for them and in turn loved coming back from work to meet a ready meal or some treat.

Big Sis used to get irritated at my ‘thankful politeness’ to sales persons, cab drivers, bus drivers, seeing it as a sign of ‘colonial subservience’ I think. I tried to make her see that it was just UK culture. Yes, I know I paid for the service but I am thankful that it was a mutually satisfying experience/exchange. She, on the other hand is a product of Nigerian culture where thanks and gratitude are usually one directional - from the bottom to the top.

My Sis loves shopping, especially the flexible refund policy. 60% of clothes bought get to be returned the next day. After showing her the way to the shopping malls in Milton Keynes central and Bletchley, I happily excused myself. Shopping is exhausting abeg!

I loved showing them around Milton Keynes or Ginger’s little village as they called it. It was an opportunity for me to get to know my way around MK too. We went to the Cinema on take two Thursday and saw Les Miserables (first time for her, second time for me). And yes, I cried again. My tears greatly amused her ‘like maka why lol.

The Sisters and DBF got to meet. And because DBF’s mom was around, they got to meet too. Mini introductions?? Lips sealed.

In other news, it was alarming if not depressing to hear about Boko Haram’s fatal attacks on school students again. The last one is the 3rd one in 4months if I am not mistaken. GEJ’s response to this issue leaves a lot to be desired. A LOT!!
I would also wish that Media houses and Journalists put more about putting faces to these tragedies. Don’t these children have faces photographs? This number business just dehumanizes them. Let the Nation and President Goodluck be looking at the faces of the lives lost to his inaction. Maybe it will make him think of his own sons.

The recent Air tragedies and the way they are being handled leave a lot to be desired from the Aviation Ministress and all stakeholders.  
May the Souls of the faithfully departed, through the mercy of God, rest in peace, Amen.

Pastor Biodun Fatoyinbo of COZA Ministries has it seems, proven that Silence is Golden. He is still winning with his congregation while Ese Walters will be remembered as the woman who dared to call a Man of God to order. Only in Nigeria.

What’s with Naija celebrities and ‘vacation picutres’? Thanking God the spate of vacation picturing is over!! The thing tired me o. When you want to copy, copy well na. I look at Beyonce’s vacation pictures (beach/swimmimg/fun) and I look at Ini Edo (pix inside plane, on the stairs of some non-descript hotel). Seven Up!
No it’s not about the luxury of a yacht. It is the fact that you see a couple actually having a holiday. Letting their hair down. Doing fun things. The glorious sea background only added to it.

Still on celebrity gossip, Ive not been able to get Omotola Jalade’s interview with Sunday Telegraph’s Stella Magazine off my mind. Talk about damning with faint praise. I’m torn between chuckling at the interviewer’s use of words and feeling bad for her. Then again, any publicity is better than none in the celebrity world so my sympathy might not be needed.
The saddest bit was her not realizing she was being had...there was this gauche innocence/pseudo confidence in her responses…..or maybe it didn’t seem like that during the interview
“The biggest film star you never heard of scores a zero on the Hollywood richter scale”.
“Big body, big hair, big personality, big laugh..she comes across like Oprah’s sister”
About Nollywood movies – “histrionic acting combines with often ludicrous plot lines”
Plots “akin to half cooking food to feed impatient mouths and the results feel like first drafts”
And her simpering – “I actually got scared and nearly called the police” at her near mobbing in a nearby Tesco (In Peckham maybe?). I have no beef with her being recognized but that mention of Tesco was soo not de riguer. Lol. Why not at Harrods? Okay I am a wannabe snob. Sue me.
I noticed the interviewer mentioned that Omotola kept em waiting ‘the big superstar delay’. Bingo. Me thinks that is why he served her up on a hot dish. Most Western journalists are not nice to celebrities who don’t respect their time. Anyway, its still a feather in her cap so Congratulations. It isn’t easy.

A big shout out to BlogMom Linda Medrano (hope you get well soon), Style Enthusiast, JustJoxy, Angel’s beauty, Atilola, Congratulations to new Mom Lucidlilith and her cute baby boy Turtilla (named by me), Belated Birthday wishes Myne (thumbs up on your dedication to raising Awareness about domestic violence in October!), Nwunye, Toinlicious (please no pounded yam stories this month lol), latest New Yorker MsTizzle, Meg of Nanny Goat in Panties (her recent post reminds me of how a blogging enriches lives), Jayne, Harry Itie, Cherry Chatter, Sisi Yemmie (pls lets help her and Yomi win My big Nigerian Wedding with our votes), Good Naija Girl (Congrats on another year of Naija Blog awards), Oroque, Le Proffeseur (where is he?), Da-Grumbler, Air Mecca, my followers both the old and the latest members, THANK YOU!!

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